Dose of 2015

It was a year, 2014.  We had some victories together and we also left some challenges unfinished.  As we rollover into 2015, it is a great time to reflect on where you’re at, envision where you want to be and how you plan to get there.  There will be a lot of “enlightened” people calling resolutions by different names.  I don’t care if you call them goals, intentions, plans, resolutions or wishes upon a star.  There is value if you reflect, envision and plan (REP).

This post will feature my 2015 REPs for myself and apparently my IntimiDATER alter ego has decided to weigh in.  This should be fun.

Let’s start with me. The real me.  JD, El Jefe, The Great Jefferini or any of a host of nicknames you might know me as.  I have some big stuff in store for 2015 and these are the highlights:

• Raise funds and shoot the IntimiDATER web series.  I’ve already written the first “season” script, now I just need to kick up either Kickstarter or IndieGoGo and see what we can raise to make it happen.  Spoiler: It’s SUPER funny and great and I love everyone that’s involved, so you’ll want to support.  I’m just sayin.
• Fitness.  I’m taking a new approach to fitness this year.  I’m not just seeing it purely for personal pride of my physical aesthetic.  I mean seriously, I still get attention from the ladies, so where’s the motivation in that! (Um…IntimiDATER..not your turn).  As we do some shooting and try to sell projects, I need to see being camera-ready as part of my JOB.  That way, I’ll put the discipline in, like what’s needed to write. It’s just as important. My Microsoft Band will help a ton and it’s already making me aware of things like my sleep habits and how much daily activity I’m putting out.  Paired up with the MyFitnessPal app, I think we’re going to get this done.
• Language.  I’ve already started this one too, but it’s time to commit to learning some foreign tongue.  Seriously, IntimiDATER…no smart response?  So, I’m using the app, DuoLingo.  If you have a smartphone, you can learn for the total cost of FREE.  They have apps for Windows Phone, iOS and Android.  Even if you don’t have a smartphone, they have a great website. The lessons are short and kind of fun and the whole thing is game-ified.  You can literally do your daily lesson in 10-15 minutes with your phone before you get out of bed.  I have been kind of sporadic, but the plan is to do 5 lessons a week.  That gives time to make up time in case something prevents me from getting the study in for a day or two. I’m improving my Spanish and learning French from scratch.  FYI: that French is hard.
• Real Estate License: I’m starting an online course to study for my real estate license.  My intention with this is two-fold.  I’d like to delve deeper into the world of property management and I’d like to help veterans buy homes.  You won’t see my name attached to multi-million dollar houses in the hills, but I hope to help change some lives for those who served and earned their VA home loan benefits.
• Read some fiction.  I like to read things like the Freakonomics series, but when people talk about “reading”, they usually refer to non-fiction novels.  I’m grown accustomed to saying, “I don’t read”, but now I might sneak in a couple of recreational reads this year.  Don’t tell anyone as I’ll still use the “I don’t read” line at parties.  It lowers the bar in a fun way.

So those are the main areas that I’m focusing on during this transition from 2014 to 2015.  Peppered in with the process will be things like getting more organized.

Before I hand it over to IntimiDATER, I want to talk about REPs one more time:

• Reflect. You really do need to know where you are before moving forward. You need to own up to the shortcoming and you need to be proud of your strengths.  Have gratitude what you have.
• Envision.  This is the fun part.  Write your own story.  Be the person that you think you can be…plus a bit more.  If you find things to be passionate about, then you’re well on your way to finding the motivation needed to do the not-as-fun work to make it happen.
• Plan.  Yup, I’m a fan of planning.  I’m not a fan of over planning, but you do need a roadmap.  If you want to get in shape, there are things you have to do and changes that you have to make.  If you want to learn a foreign language, you have to schedule the time.  If you want to make bigger dreams happen, you have to break it down into parts and then work on getting those smaller victories. Write ‘em down. Hang ‘em up. Work that plan!

The final piece is executing, but in my mind that is part of the plan. The “plan” isn’t just conceiving it, but also doing it.  Do your REPS.

…and now, let me apologize as I hand it over to…

IntimiDATER art credit: Julie Hunting

Yeah, those things are great. Get fit…get more babes.  Get that license, make more money…get more babes.  I think the #1 aspiration that Jeff needs to do is to shoot IntimiDATER.  It is about time to get my wit and wisdom out to the masses.  That will get more exposure and more exposure leads to more b…you know what I’m saying.

I like that REP talk too.  It’s great when you’re out on the scene.  Reflect – on the fact that you have no female companionship for the night or longer, if that’s your thing.  Envision – her or her or maybe even her and definitely her.  Plan – what’s your opening line going to be? How will NOT buy her a drink and still seem like a baller?  Be sure to follow me on Twitter: @Intimi_DATER

A couple of years ago, we wrote  A DalyDose of Single Resolutions.  I thought about updating it for 2014, but without arrogance, I can say that it’s perfect as is, so I’m going to repost it here with some *commentary.

1. Never, under any circumstances will I buy a girl a drink.  It’s 2011 2015 and women are our equals.  Heck she should be buying ME a drink, right?  *Yes, you are empowering her equality at the most basic of levels.

2. Offer to “let” women buy you drinks.  If they give you a strange look,  refer to resolution number one and proclaim yourself an enlightened feminist man, just trying to do the right thing.

3.  Always walk up and introduce yourself to the most attractive woman in the room.  Trust me when I tell you that other people notice and you will get huge street cred with anyone in sight.  Make her smile and laugh and other women will want to know who that dude is.  (Hint…it’s you)  Heck, she might even like your courage and want you for herself.  It’s gotta work, right?  The models always say that men are so intimidated by them that they never get asked out.  *If I wrote this list again, this would  be #1.

4. If you are on a date and the woman you are with is not the most attractive woman in the room, for the love of all that is holy, do not let her SEE you pull resolution number 3.  Do that move on your way to the bathroom.  If your date asks you who you were talking, just say “nobody…wow I am seriously hypnotized by your eyes”.  *Dating is dangerous and you have to be ready for anything!

5.  If you’ve lasted this long I have a real treat for you.  Resolve to use and trust one and only one pickup line: “You OK?”.  After you utter these three simple syllables, shut your mouth and let her respond.  I’m not joking here; this is gold!  A confident woman will smile and let you know all is well.  A needy woman will get flustered and start checking her hair and makeup.  An arrogant woman will look at you in disgust and walk away.  Three syllables were never a more powerful tool. *This is literally dating gold. I could write a whole blog on just this.

6.  On New Year’s Eve or anytime in January really, announce to a woman that SHE is your New Year’s resolution.  You have to have a balanced attack here.  If you are too serious…CREEPSVILLE.  If you appear to be joking….FRIEND ZONE.  Trust me when I tell you that you don’t want to take up residence in either place.  *Making the girl feel important gets some attention. I’d add some action to this like “YOU are my New Year’s Resolution. If you give me your number I can check that off the list and get to the work of wooing you.”

7.  Speaking of FRIEND ZONE.  Put a population cap on that place.  It gets real crowded, real quickly.  Have internal GPS for anyone headed toward that place.  Let ‘em know that you will not allow them into the friend zone.  If they are looking to go there, you can part as acquaintances.  It saves everyone a lot of time really.  You’re just doing her a favor.  The weather and the dinners are better in the Interested In Me Zone. *I can’t stress this enough. Ignore those who will say “what’s wrong with being friends”.  They don’t get it.

8.  Be OK with “relationships” that last through breakfast.  I used to be unreasonable and say that some relationships should end BEFORE breakfast, but I heard it’s the most important meal of the day. So, if she’s willing to cook it…I’m just sayin’.

9.  Get in touch with your “Inner Jerk”. I’m not going to explain it here, I need more traffic and I’ve already written about that HERE.   *Let’s just call this being the IntimiDATER!

10.  Avoid all small talk.  Don’t participate in biographical data conversations.  She’s just looking to see how much money you make or how stable your relationship with your mother is.  Divert them with talks of “feelings”.  Women get intoxicated with that stuff.  Ask them about their dreams.  They’ll be so enamored with you and lost in their own feelings that you’ll have plenty of time to eyeball the room for a resolution number one target!  I love when things go full circle.

11.  This is a Top 10 list and we are on number 11.  BONUS: This resolution is that you should always try to over achieve.  Go for a woman who’s way hotter than you think you can get. You are in Los Angeles; every cheerleader, prom queen, pageant winner and high school musical star lives here.  They got by in the first part of their lives based on their looks.  Now they live in a place where good looking is standard, thus their aesthetic-based self-esteem suffers.  That is your opportunity…to…uh…raise her self-esteem.  Getting a smoking hot date for yourself is just a bonus.  *100% truth.

*I think I’m going to have Mr. Writer/Director/Actor film these tips in 2015. They’re too good to keep to myself.  I’m a giver. You’re welcome!