Top 10 Signs Today, that you’re in a Midwest airport, or at least not at LAX.

1. There are payphones…a significant number of payphones. No one is using them, but, you know….they could.

2. People are wearing shoes. Not flip flops or sandals or bare feet…except for the dude sitting behind me on the plane who almost left with vomit toes.

3. I’ve only heard one language being spoken. To be fair, the accents are varied.

4. I’ve seen more places selling beer than fresh squeezed juice.

5. Traffic is heavier on the runway than the freeway.

6. There is a strong diversity…of electronics. The iCult has a presence, but it’s not dominant.

7. I heard someone properly order a carbonated, beverage…as POP. It should also be noted that there was a line at McDonald’s. California’s have an irrational level of hatred for the Golden Arches

8. I have legitimately seen zero people taking selfies or video chatting.

9. No one seems to be just heading out to find themselves or go on a social media boast trip. Many, many people seem to have a common affliction. I think the technical term for it is, employment. Who knew people traveled to be productive

10. In what might be the most unionized, liberal place in the country, I’ve not heard one political quip, snark, or any of the unending anger laced, “clever” activism. People are pleasant and it’s safe to talk to them without them finding a way to twist any topic into telling you about their political views. No, they don’t need to be “woke”.

Bonus

There are places everywhere to charge your phone…for free! They even have FREE stations to use a tablet.